Galactically Stupid - The Whole Story

By ML Thompson <thomplaw@tbaytel.net>

Rated: PG

Submitted: March, 2006

* * * * * * * * *

Before you get started, WARNING! I'm not entirely sure if  'Galactically Stupid' is the name of the story or a description  of me for writing it. I will tell you this: I've been working  hard the past couple of months. And I tend to get a little  punch-drunk when I'm tired. So... READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

One point of order. I was really disappointed that we weren't  given any deleted scenes on the Lois and Clark DVDs (at least  season one and two since that's all that have been released at  the writing of this story). So this is my attempt to correct that  - sort of <g>.

This is a fanfic based on the television show, Lois and Clark:  The New Adventures of Superman. No copyright infringement is  intended. I'm borrowing these characters for a little fun and not  for any profit. For a complete disclaimer, go to:  http://www.thompsonlawoffice.ca/Disclaimer.htm

Thanks to Carol and Gerry for their corrections and their ideas.  Their help, as always, is greatly appreciated. Furthermore,  thanks to everyone for their comments on the Fanfic Message  Boards. They were both encouraging and very helpful. Finally, my  thanks to Tricia Walpole for her assistance in editing this story  for the archives.

* * * * * * * * * Galactically Stupid By: ML Thompson <thomplaw@tbaytel.net> March 2006 * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scene From The Pilot

Lois pounded impatiently on the door. She'd told him she'd pick  him up at nine. So why was he taking so long to answer? This was  why she hated working with partners - they never took the job as  seriously as she did. She raised her hand again when the door  suddenly opened and...

Lois' mouth went slack when she saw... Muscles and sinew, knitted  together in perfect unity. Or... well, she was getting ahead of  herself. It was obvious that she'd interrupted his shower. His  hair, although combed neatly back, was still wet. A single  strand, stubbornly refusing its place with the rest of his hair,  dropped onto his forehead leaving Lois with the sudden, and quite  unexpected, impulse to push it back in place.

She fought the impulse off. And had it only been his hair, she  might have been successful in ignoring the gorgeous specimen  standing in front of her. But her eyes didn't stay on that lock  of hair. Pretty much ignoring his face, her eyes sought to know  the body. Arms that she'd have a problem getting both hands  around. A broad chest with hard pecs which tapered into a narrow  waist. Everywhere she looked, she was confronted by bulging  muscles and nowhere could she spot an ounce of extra fat.

His body was still glimmering as small droplets of water clung to  it. One suddenly took that moment to escape, running down his  stomach to disappear in the simple white towel that was wrapped  around his waist. Her tongue was suddenly begging to be allowed  to dart out and catch that particular droplet.

Yet this entire exploration took only a matter of seconds before  she managed to forcibly remind herself to look away, to meet his  eyes. She was there for work. The Messenger. The shuttle. The  space program. Story. Plot against. Right.

She cleared her throat, hoping that her voice would work in spite  of the sudden lack of moisture in her mouth. "It's nine o'clock.  I thought you'd be... Superman!" she exclaimed.

Those hard pecs. That rock solid body. Those bedroom eyes. Even  that stubborn lock of hair. She instantly knew who he was.

"Superman?" Clark asked in confusion, even as he took a slight  step back. "Lois, I..."

"Don't even try to deny it, Clark! Did you honestly think I  wouldn't figure it out? What do you think I am? Galactically  stupid?"

"But... Lois... I haven't invented Superman yet. That doesn't  happen until later in this episode. Remember? You discover a bomb  on the shuttle. Superman comes. Eats the bomb. Ringing any bells  here?"

Lois let out a breath. "Okay, so maybe I jumped the gun a little,  Clark. But I'm just so sick of all these stories that portray me  as galactically stupid. After all, a pair of glasses. A flashy  costume. A little bit of hair gel. Just how stupid do people  think I am? And really, when you think about it, I make these  amazing leaps of logic in order to get to the bottom of a story.  So what's wrong with my figuring out the Clark/Superman  connection before you invent Superman?" She glared at Clark,  daring him to contradict her.

After a moment, he let out a breath. "You're right, Lois. There  should be at least one story out there that shows how truly  brilliant you are." Then his eyebrows crinkled. "There is one  problem, though."

"What's that?"

"The love story."

"What do you mean? There's nothing that says I can't fall in love  with you even though I figure out your secret."

"No. Of course not. But... well, that's what makes this love  story so special, so unique. You instantly fall head-over-heels  in love with Superman. Clark instantly falls head-over-heels in  love with you. It's the ultimate love triangle."

Lois crinkled her eyebrows as she thought about that. He had a  point. By figuring it out this early, was she risking the love  story? Maybe. And what was more important to her - the love story  or having people know she wasn't galactically stupid? A small  grin quirked at the corner of her mouth as her eyes again  wandered down his body. Well, maybe she wouldn't do it for the  love story - after all, she wasn't entirely sure she believed in  love - but... if she played her cards right, in three years she'd  have exclusive access to that body. The grin on her face  widened.

"Fine," she said with resignation. "We'll do this your way." She  took a few steps back until she was again standing outside his  hotel room.

He gave her a smile before softly closing the door.

Taking a deep breath, she raised her hand, knocking on the wood.  She'd told him she'd pick him up at nine. So why was he taking so  long to answer? This was why she hated working with partners -  they never took the job as seriously as she did. She raised her  hand again when the door suddenly opened and...

Lois' mouth went slack when she saw... Muscles and sinew, knitted  together in perfect unity. Or... well, she was getting ahead of  herself. It was obvious that she'd interrupted his shower. His  hair, although combed neatly back, was still wet. A single  strand, stubbornly refusing its place with the rest of his hair,  dropped onto his forehead leaving Lois with the sudden, and quite  unexpected, impulse to push it back in place.

She fought the impulse off. And had it only been his hair, she  might have been successful in ignoring the gorgeous specimen  standing in front of her. But her eyes didn't stay on that lock  of hair. Pretty much ignoring his face, her eyes sought to know  the body. Arms that she'd have a problem getting both hands  around. A broad chest with hard pecs which tapered into a narrow  waist. Everywhere she looked, she was confronted by bulging  muscles and nowhere could she spot an ounce of extra fat.

His body was still glimmering as small droplets of water clung to  it. One suddenly took that moment to escape, running down his  stomach to disappear in the simple white towel that was wrapped  around his waist. Her tongue was suddenly begging to be allowed  to dart out and catch that particular droplet.

Yet this entire exploration took only a matter of seconds before  she managed to forcibly remind herself to look away, to meet his  eyes. She was there for work. The Messenger. The shuttle. The  space program. Story. Plot against. Right.

She cleared her throat, hoping that her voice would work in spite  of the sudden lack of moisture in her mouth. "It's nine o'clock.  I thought you'd be naked... umm... ready," she said, meeting his  amused expression. As he turned, heading for the washroom, she  stepped inside, closing the door.

For a moment, she leaned against it, hoping people would  appreciate the sacrifice she was making in order to keep the love  story alive - even as, in her mind's eye, she was again exploring  that body.

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scene From Honeymoon In Metropolis

Lois examined the equipment, ensuring they had everything ready  for their surveillance. She had to admit, she was still slightly  annoyed at Perry for assigning Clark to help her with this  stakeout. If she had to listen to one more 'blushing bride' joke,  she was going to hit someone.

Suddenly, Clark threw the blanket over their equipment and  grabbed her from behind.

"Are you insane?" Lois gasped. Instead of answering her, he  flipped her over to land on her back on the bed, his body  pressing into hers. "Clark, this is not funny." Then, before she  could say anything further, Clark's lips were on hers, his hands  pinning hers to the bed.

What was he doing? They might be posing as newlyweds, but they  weren't. In fact, she often barely tolerated his company. She  squirmed beneath him, determined to dislodge his weight and then,  perhaps drive her point home with a knee to a sensitive part of  his anatomy.

Click.

"More towels? Yeah?"

Lois froze beneath Clark, suddenly understanding. The maid. She  closed her eyes, returning Clark's kiss to assist in his  illusion. They were posing as newlyweds. And she had told him,  the last time they'd been caught in a compromising situation, to  maintain that they were sharing a moment of passion so... God,  his kiss was incredible. But then she knew that. She'd kissed him  just before Trask had thrown her out of an airplane. But this...  His body pressed into hers. His hands holding hers hostage. She  opened her mouth slightly and was rewarded by the soft brush of  his tongue, stroking inside her lower lip, sending sparks  throughout her body. Her tongue came out to flick at his,  attracting his attention as he chased her tongue back into her  mouth.

"Oops. Sorry..."

In the back of her mind, Lois heard the maid's awkward apology  and quick exit from the room. And then.... No! Clark began to  move back, finally releasing her lips and her hands. No!

Her arms came up immediately, pulling him back down and claiming  his lips in a kiss of pure passion, even as her body moved  restlessly under his.

"Lois, what are you doing?" Clark gasped, panting when he finally  managed to break away.

"What? Are you honestly telling me you don't want me?"

"But..." Clark looked confused. "I thought you were in love with  Superman," he said, his eyes lighting up as if glad to have found  an argument that would get her to back off.

"Clark? What do you think I am? Galactically stupid? You are  Superman!"

Clark's mouth fell slightly open. "How... how long have you  known?"

Lois rolled her eyes, wishing that they could simply end this  discussion and go back to the kissing part. "I told you that I  knew who you were back when I saw you in that towel. You're the  one who said we had to wait to allow for the whole love triangle  thing. So... been there, done that, bought the t-shirt." She  tugged again at his shirt. "Now why don't we just get down to  business here?"

Lois smiled when a stunned Clark allowed her to pull her back to  him, kissing her again. It wasn't long before kissing was no  longer enough. Her hands snaked under his shirt, growling in  frustration when she felt the Superman suit underneath. "Clark,  how..." She pulled at the suit, trying to find a way to get her  hands under it.

"Wait, wait, wait." Clark pulled back, struggling to catch his  breath. "Lois, we can't."

"What do you mean we can't? We've done everything we're supposed  to do. Now..."

"But this isn't the way things are supposed to go. We don't make  love until we get married."

"Who came up with that stupid rule? No one consulted me about it.  And tell me something, how does our moving the time-line up a bit  hurt our love story?" She raised herself on her elbows as Clark  moved back to take a seat on the side of the bed.

"It doesn't, but... well, don't you remember the curse?"

"The curse?"

"You know. Tempus. Lady Loisette. The Fox. You dying of some  horrible disease if we consummate."

Lois allowed herself to collapse back on the bed, closing her  eyes. "So..." she began after a moment, "...how do we break the  stupid curse? I suppose we need a time machine."

Clark shrugged.

"I don't suppose you have one in your back pocket," Lois said,  even as the reality of the situation sank in.

"Sorry."

"So..."

"So..."

"I guess we wait. If I recall correctly Tempus doesn't show up  until season two. Although, to tell the truth, my memory of that  first meeting is a little... foggy. It's almost as if someone  tried to erase my memory."

"Yeah. That's how I feel, too. But... Lois, I don't think we have  a choice."

"Fine." Lois rose to her feet. "Get the maid back in here."

As Clark rushed to do as commanded, Lois turned her attention to  getting the bed straightened, concentrating on returning the  camera equipment to the place they had been before their  passionate interlude. She had to admit, she was still slightly  annoyed at Perry for assigning Clark to help her with this  stakeout. If she had to listen to one more 'blushing bride' joke,  she was going to hit someone.    Suddenly, Clark threw the blanket over their equipment and  grabbed her from behind.

"Are you insane?" Lois gasped. Instead of answering her, he  flipped her over to land on her back on the bed, his body  pressing into hers. "Clark, this is not funny." Then, before she  could say anything further, Clark's lips were on hers, his hands  pinning hers to the bed.

What was he doing? They might be posing as newlyweds, but they  weren't. In fact, she often barely tolerated his company. She  squirmed beneath him, determined to dislodge his weight and then,  perhaps drive her point home with a knee to a sensitive part of  his anatomy.

Click.

"More towels? Yeah?"

Lois froze beneath Clark, suddenly understanding. The maid. She  closed her eyes, returning Clark's kiss to assist in his  illusion. They were posing as newlyweds. And she had told him,  the last time they'd been caught in a compromising situation, to  maintain that they were sharing a moment of passion so... God,  his kiss was incredible. But then she knew that. She'd kissed him  just before Trask had thrown her out of an airplane. But this...  His body pressed into hers. His hands holding hers hostage. She  opened her mouth slightly and was rewarded by the soft brush of  his tongue, stroking inside her lower lip, sending sparks  throughout her body. Her tongue came out to flick at his,  attracting his attention as he chased her tongue back into her  mouth.

"Oops. Sorry..."

In the back of her mind, Lois heard the maid's awkward apology  and quick exit from the room. And then.... Clark began to move  back, finally releasing her lips and hands.

Lois let him go, raising herself on her elbows. "Doesn't anyone  knock around here?" she demanded, not quite able to meet Clark's  gaze.

Okay, so it wasn't time. Still... Her eyes drifted down his body,  not quite able to believe what she was willing to put up with if  the end result was having access to that body. But when she  finally did meet Tempus, she was going to make sure he paid for  this.

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scene From Fly Hard

Lex and Clark moved in on each other, eyes locked, looking like  two stags, circling each other as they waited to attack. Lois  watched, wondering if she should put herself between them before  things got seriously out of control. They had to find a way to  defeat the terrorists now holding them hostage at the Daily  Planet. And that wasn't going to happen if they spent their time  fighting one another.

After all, half of their fight was over her. She knew that. And  it wasn't as if she minded. Driving Clark up the wall was half  the reason she was dating Lex. If he wasn't so stubborn,  insisting that they do things 'by the rules,' they could have  gotten together months ago. But 'that wasn't the way things were  supposed to go.' How many times had she heard that now? Okay, so  maybe only twice. But it was two times too many. So now he could  just suffer - wondering what her feelings for Lex really were.

"Then what do you suggest, Mr. Kent?" Luthor asked. "That we just  sit here, let them do whatever they want. Then wait for them to  kill us?"

"I have no choice! If I try to get to the bomb, one of the others  might kill any one of you. And if that's a hair trigger under his  finger, it could go off faster than I could stop it. I can't take  that risk."

Lois' eyebrows rose as she stared at Clark. In her peripheral  vision, she could tell that everyone else was looking as stunned  as she. Oh, she knew of course what her next line was supposed to  be. But try as she might, she couldn't quite bring herself to say  it. Regardless of the eventual payoff, she couldn't quite bring  herself to look that galactically stupid.

"Clark, take it easy," Perry said when she didn't respond.  "You're not Superman."

"I know, but even..."

"Oh for crying out loud," Lois interrupted. "Look at him!" She  turned towards the others in the room. "Are you all galactically  stupid? Now, I could understand Jimmy not figuring it out or Jack  here, but, Chief... You're the editor of the world's greatest  paper. How is it that you don't know? Think about the number of  story meetings he's suddenly disappeared from. How is it that you  didn't notice? And you, Lex... How is it that you haven't figured  it out?"

"Loisss," Clark hissed behind her.

But she was on a roll now. "Come on, Lex. You've been looking for  a way to destroy Superman since he first came on the scene. And  yet it never once occurred to you to wonder what Superman did  when he wasn't wearing the suit?"

"Well, after I saw the messages from the globe... I did sort of  wonder."

"And it never occurred to you to look right under your nose?"

"He does sort of look like Superman," Perry said.

"Yeah, but..." Lex began, examining Kent closely.

"Hey, I'm not Superman," Clark objected, giving Lois a look that  instantly silenced her. "It's just..." He fiddled with his  glasses. "A passing resemblance, maybe. A thing I do at  parties."

"Yeah, that makes sense," Lex said.

"Don't worry, son," Perry added. "We didn't really believe you  were Superman. So..." He looked at the others. "How do we get out  of here?"

Lois shook her head as she watched them continue to cling to  their denial. She'd done everything she could do to prove her  point. If they were too galactically stupid to see, that wasn't  her fault.

She looked back at Clark who was giving her an amused grin, and  rolled her eyes. Some days things just seemed so weird.

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scenes From Tempus Fugitive

Lois made her way down the ramp into the newsroom, holding her  birthday present for Perry.

"Morning, Lois," Clark said, joining her beside her desk.

"You're late."

"Morning, Clark," Clark responded, removing a wrapped gift from a  bag. "What'd you get him?" he asked.

"Checked suspenders."

"Didn't you give him that last year?"

"Well..." Damn. He was right. She had given Perry checked  suspenders last year. "He liked them, didn't he?" Lois pouted.

A ding of the elevator caught Lois' attention. Looking towards  the doors, she watched as an odd looking man stepped out. His  clothing was old-fashioned, as if he'd just stepped off the set  of a turn of the century English movie.

His eyes swept the newsroom until he spotted her and Clark. He  began walking towards them. Without realizing she was doing it,  she grabbed onto Clark's arm, digging her fingers in. "Clark,  it's Wells," she whispered.

Clark looked over at her, confused. "Who?"

"Come on, Clark. Tempus' traveling companion. That means Tempus  is waiting in the..." She released his arm, seizing her jacket  and heading with purpose towards the elevator. She only stopped  when Clark grabbed her arm.

"Excuse me... I'm H.G. Wells," the man said before Clark could  explain why he'd stopped her.

As far as Lois was concerned, Wells was irrelevant. Oh, sure. He  had the time machine. And, yes, she planned on figuring it out  and going back to reverse the curse. But... it was Tempus she  wanted. She was going to tear Tempus limb from bloody limb.

"And I've run into a spot of trouble. I've been traveling with a  companion in my time machine... And we've just come back from the  future. I've left him in the park, actually, but..."

"I'm going to kill him," Lois whispered to Clark, being sure to  say it softly enough that Wells wouldn't overhear her.

"We stopped here because..."

"Sir, we're a little busy, so let's wrap this up. Time travel  isn't possible. H.G. Wells wrote fiction... and died in 1946,"  Clark concluded, leading Wells away.

Lois rolled her eyes. Typical Clark. He was still insisting on doing this by the book - or the script as the case may be.

"I know you're Superman and I need your help," Wells said.

Lois heard him and rolled her eyes. Wells really must think that  she was galactically stupid - not to have figured out the  Clark/Superman connection. Otherwise, he wouldn't bother speaking in that ridiculous conspiratorial whisper. Please. To not  overhear that, she'd have to be deaf.

Clark looked at Wells. "Could you just give me a minute here?" he  asked Wells, before turning back to Lois.

"What are we waiting for, Clark?" Lois demanded when he returned.  "Tempus is in the park."

"No, he isn't, Lois. Remember? We go down to the park with Wells  and find that Tempus has wandered off. But... Lois, do you  remember what happens?"

"It's fuzzy, but... yeah, sort of."

"Then you know that if we don't play this out the way it's  supposed to go down, Tempus might well end up killing me as a  baby."

Lois opened her mouth to respond, but then closed it again. As  much as she hadn't wanted them to, her feelings for Clark had  developed beyond that initial feeling of lust she'd had when  she'd seen him in that towel. If he was killed, she'd miss him -  more than she could possibly say. And besides... if he was killed  as a baby, she'd never have a chance to know that body. The fact  that she'd just contradicted herself didn't even occur to her.  "Okay, fine. We play this out. But then... Tempus is all mine."  She turned, about to head over to where Wells was waiting for  them. Suddenly, she turned back around. "Oh, and just for your  information, once we straighten out this whole curse thing...  you're all mine, too."

* * * * * * * * *

Lois made her way down the ramp into the newsroom, holding her  birthday present for Perry.

"Morning, Lois," Clark said, joining her beside her desk.

"You're late."

"Morning, Clark," Clark responded, removing a wrapped gift from a  bag.

Lois suddenly felt that something was wrong. "I have the weirdest  feeling of deja vu..."

"Don't tell me, you got him checked suspenders again."

"How'd you know?"

"You got him that last year, didn't you?"

"Clark, I'm serious."

"Well, now that you mention it..."

"Damn!"

"Lois?"

Lois looked around. They were back in the Planet - just as if  their previous adventure had never happened. "H.G. Wells," she  muttered in exasperation.

"The science fiction writer?"

"Clark, he wiped out our memories before we had a chance to go  back and deal with Tempus in the past."

"What are you talking about, Lois?"

"The curse, Clark! You do remember the curse, don't you? And...  Maybe he's still around somewhere. We have to find him, Clark. We  have to go back and break the curse. I mean I might like the  whole 'put Tempus in an asylum' thing. But we need to go back and  break the curse."

She looked around frantically, but Wells was gone.

"Hey, Lois. Don't worry. We'll get another chance."

Lois glared at him. He might be content to wait for another year  and a half, but... Her eyes swept down Clark's body. Damn! It  just wasn't fair.

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scene From And The Answer Is...

Lois and Clark walked hand in hand through the park, heading,  without any real thought, towards the fountain.

"Sometimes," Clark said, "you think you're immortal. And you  start to think the people around you are, too. It just takes a  second to realize how wrong you are about everything." He  stopped, directing her to take a seat on the edge of the  fountain. "What I'm trying to say is," he said when she was  finally seated, "I almost lost you, Lois, and I'm... ashamed."

"Ashamed? Why?"

"I kept pushing you away - even when I promised to stop. And if  you died not knowing why, I'd never be able to forgive myself.  Because I love you, Lois, and..."

Thunder cracked overhead and lightning lit up the darkened sky.  The universe took that moment to open up and rain began coming  down.

"Oh, come on, give me a break!" Clark yelled at the heavens.

"Do you want to go back?"

"If the Earth opened up at my feet, I wouldn't move 'til I'd  finished saying this..." He took a deep breath. "Lois..." He  dropped to one knee in front of her, pulling a small velvet box  from his pocket and opening it. "...will you marry me?"

She stared at the ring for a long moment before looking back at  him. She leaned forward, almost as if she would kiss him. Her  lips only inches from his. Then she pulled back. "My god, Clark!  I can't believe you."

"Lois?"

"Okay," she continued, rising to her feet to begin pacing in the  rain. "Maybe I did jump the gun a little bit in figuring out that  you were Superman. But really, Clark, you left it too long!  Asking me to marry you before telling me about Superman?"

He stared at her in stunned disbelief. "Lois, I..."

"Oh, come on, Clark. You know that I know. But you still had to  tell me. That was the way the script goes, isn't it?"

"Actually, according to the script, I ask you to marry me and you  answer: 'Who's asking? Clark... or Superman?'"

"That's not the point!"

"So I take it you're mad?"

"Mad doesn't even begin to cover it, Clark. I..."

"You're still going to follow the script though?"

"Why should I? Why not just tell everyone that I've known all  along? Prove that I'm not galactically stupid. I'm not sure why I  played along this long."

"Lois, you can't!"

"Just watch me, Clark!"

"No, I mean... the love story. The triangle. If people know you  knew from the beginning, there will be no unique love triangle."

She opened her mouth before closing it again. He was right. And  if she did this... She was so close to getting what she wanted.  She looked at him; even soaking wet, he was easily the most  gorgeous man she'd ever seen. And soon now... Oh, yeah. She might  be furious with him at the moment, but... if playing this by the  rules just a little while longer would get her what she wanted...  Fine. Besides, even going by the script, she got to make him pay  for proposing before telling her about Superman. So really... was  she really giving anything up? "Okay, we'll play this your way.  So... who's asking? Clark... or Superman?"

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scene From The End of Virtually Destroyed

Lois and Clark made their way into Jason Xavier's Virtual Reality  Center, each looking around carefully to ensure that the police  had all left. They found Jimmy, alone in the lab, typing  ferociously on a key board.

"So how's it..." Clark cleared his throat nervously. "How's it  coming, Jimmy?"

Lois shot Clark a look, hoping Jimmy didn't notice how nervous  Clark was.

"Great. I just need..." Jimmy pressed a few more keys. "There!"  he exclaimed pushing himself back from the keyboard. He turned to  face them. "Not exactly good as new, but... almost."

"So then..." said Lois, making her way over to the goggles and  gloves in what she hoped looked like a casual manner. ?...I could  just put these on and..."

"You press this button and... Presto! You'd be back in the  virtual world," Jimmy said.

"Any luck at finding Jason?" Clark asked, stealing slightly  heated glances at Lois.

"Nah. Wherever he is... he's not in there."

"Well, that's tough luck." Clark grasped the young man's shoulder  as he rose. "Listen, how about you head on home? We'll just  finish up in here and lock up behind us."

"Hey, if you do that, I'll be eternally grateful. I've got this  date with Cindy tonight - that hot babe... uhh... woman," he  corrected when he caught Lois' glare of disapproval, "down in  accounting. Here's the keys," he said, tossing them to Clark. He  hardly had time to grab his jacket before he found himself being  escorted, rather forcefully from the room by Clark who locked the  door behind him.

Turning, Clark rushed over to keyboard, typing in a few things  before turning the keyboard slightly so that it could be seen  from the launch pads.

"You sure this is going to work?" asked Lois.

Clark nodded, even as he slid on the gloves.

"But... couldn't someone see us?"

"The doors are locked, Lois. No one will see us."

"But..."

"Next stop... your apartment." Putting on his glasses, he turned  slightly, throwing an eraser towards the key board, easily  hitting the necessary button.

"You sure this won't trigger the curse," asked Lois when she  found herself in her bedroom with Clark inside the virtual  world.

"Mmm hmm," Clark responded, pulling her into his arms so that he  could begin nibbling on her neck. "This is all in our minds."

"Right. All in our minds." Her hands made their way through his  hair as his exploration continued, his lips running down her  throat to dip into the hollow right at the base. She moaned. "Oh,  yes, Clark. Right there. Mmm... Clark, you're sure we can get out  of here?"

"Yeah, I kept the watch Jimmy gave Superman," Clark said,  completely distracted as his hands slipped up under Lois' shirt.

"But, Clark, this just seems so..."

Clark pulled back slightly. "Lois, I think this whole scenario  requires a little less talk and a lot more action."

Lois giggled when she suddenly found herself sprawled across the  bed. Clark removed his coat and pulled his shirt over his head  before leaping onto the bed to join her.

His lips again descended on hers as the struggle continued to  remove articles of clothing as quickly as possible. Their  movements grew increasingly fevered as one piece of clothing  after another fell to the floor. Skin pressed against skin. Hands  explored bodies. Lips tasted and touched. Tongues tangled.  Breathing grew increasingly heavy as they desperately sought to  know each other's bodies.

* * * * * * * * *

"Oh no!" said the computer to an empty room. "Looks like there's  another incredible power surge coming and... yeaw!" Right on cue,  sparks began jumping from the keyboard. There was a long moment  of silence as the computer ran diagnostics. "Still working.  Except... Oh, no. Not again." Another power surge sent sparks  flying in every direction. "That's it!" the computer responded.  "If they think I'm going to stand for this one more minute..."  The computer never finished the threat.

* * * * * * * * *

Lois blinked. One minute she'd been... about five seconds from  what she'd been fantasizing about for over two years and the  next...

She pulled the goggles off her eyes, discovering that she was standing in the Virtual Reality Center. She turned towards Clark  who was also removing his goggles.

"What happened?" she asked.

"I don't... I don't know. Did you touch the watch?"

"No. Look. Maybe we can still go back. Go check out the computer."

Clark moved, only to stop when a feminine voice sounded out of  nowhere.

"Don't you dare!"

Lois also looked around in horror. "Who's there?" she demanded.  "And what are you doing here? This is private property. You're  not supposed to be here."

Clark's eyebrows rose at the irony of the statement.

"I'm not supposed to be here? I'm the only one who's supposed to  be here."

"You're... not Jason?" asked Lois nervously.

"Please! I couldn't be that loser if I tried."

"You're the computer!" Clark exclaimed.

"Give the man a prize. Now... get out!"

"I don't suppose we could just have another few minutes to..."  began Lois.

"No!"

"But really, if we could just..."

Lois was still objecting when Clark began pulling her towards the  door.

The computer waited until they left before speaking again. "Thank  god they're out of here because I'm not sure I could stand  another minute of that mushy stuff. Who writes this crap  anyway?"

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scenes From Tempus, Anyone?

"Is this the absolute, total and final guest count?" asked Lois  as she and Clark walked towards the Daily Planet.

"Funny you should mention that. I ran into an old friend last  night."

"Who?"

"Lana Lang."

"Ah... an old girlfriend."

"Lois, you're getting that sound in your voice."

"What sound?"

"Like any minute claws are going to pop out and I'll be getting  you a saucer of milk. She's not worth it. We dated in high  school."

"Smallville girl," Lois responded, knowing she didn't sound  exactly... supportive. "Here in the big city. And...?"

"I told her I was getting married."

"Smart move," Lois said. "And she was...?"

"Really happy for me."

"So happy she'd like to come to the wedding?" Lois asked, seeing  where this conversation was going.

"How'd you know?"

"And how'd she take it?"

"Take what?"

"When you said, no."

"Ummm... hmm..."

"Clark?"

"Well, you have to know Lana..."

"No. No. I don't - interestingly enough."

"She's kind of... insistent. Just steam-rolls through things. So  it's not like I actually said she could come. She just sort of  said... she could come."

"Let me get this straight. You're... Superman." Lois' voice  dropped to a whisper on the last word. "And your high school  girlfriend can push you around."

"Oh, god..." His head suddenly shot up in a familiar way.  "Speaking of Superman..."

"Go. We'll finish this at the office." She gave him a quick kiss.  "Be careful."

She watched until he was out of sight before continuing her trip  towards the Daily Planet. She was passing an alley when... She  stopped when she saw a man step out of the alley.

"Hi, Lois. Remember me?"

The synapses snapped behind her eyes. Did she remember? How could  she possibly forget? She remembered it every time she and Clark  were on Clark's couch and the kissing was getting somewhat out of  control, every time she felt Clark's hands slipping under the  bottom of her shirt, every time she felt the heat of passion  flowing through her veins.

Without thinking her actions through, her knee came up, lodging  itself hard in a very sensitive part of Tempus' anatomy.  He doubled over.

Lois let out a breath. "Ahh..." she said, suddenly feeling better  than she had in months.

"What are you doing, Lois?"

Lois turned towards the sound of the familiar voice to see  Superman floating slowly to the ground.

"I would have thought that was obvious," she said, stepping  closer to Tempus so that she could dig the heel of her shoe into  his foot.

"Aggg!" Tempus groaned.

"I understand your frustration, Lois," Clark whispered. "But this  isn't the right way to deal with this."

"Why not?" asked Lois, reaching over to grab Tempus' collar,  dragging him to his feet. "Just one more..." She jabbed Tempus as  hard as she could in the ribs with her elbow, causing him to  again crumple to the ground.

Clark grabbed her arm, pulling her away from a still groaning  Tempus. "Loisss," he hissed, "think about this for a minute..."

"I've been thinking about this for two years." When Clark raised  his eyebrows, she continued. "Okay, I'll be good. What did you  want to say?"

"Just... Look, Lois, Tempus is here to take you to the other  universe. And if you don't go, then alt-Clark will never realize  his destiny."

"Is that such a bad thing, Clark? After all, I just get him  exposed to the world. And I rub his face in everything he will  never have."

"Yeah. And if you don't go there, he won't be ready when we need  him when Tempus loses me in time. And besides, think about all  those great alt-Clark stories that will never be written."

She nodded slowly. He made a couple of good points. Besides, she  could always use the time machine to go back and reverse the  curse after the whole alt-Clark adventure. "Fine. You're right."

Turning towards Tempus, she grabbed him, pulling him to his  feet.

"Please. Don't hit me again," Tempus begged.

Lois rolled her eyes. "Don't be such a big baby. You're the one  who wants to live in a hellish, violent dystopia. Let's see where  were we? Oh, yes. I remember. You just asked if I remembered you.  And I say... No, I..." When Tempus said nothing, Lois raised her  hand. "If you don't want to be hit again..."

"Remember now?" Tempus asked, removing his glasses, trying to portray a cockiness he obviously didn't feel.

* * * * * * * * *

"What do you mean, no?" asked Lois.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Lane. But I just cannot allow it."

"Can't... Listen, Mr. Wells... Herbert... Please. I'm begging you  here. I did everything I was expected to do. I gave the other  universe their Superman. I just want to make a little trip back  in time to... right a terrible injustice."

"Oh, you mean the curse thing," Wells said, catching on. "Don't  worry, Ms. Lane. That's already taken care of."

"It is?"

"Oh, yes, Ms. Lane. We dealt with that whole problem very  handily." Without waiting for her response, he fired up the time machine and simply disappeared.

Lois looked up when Superman landed next to her.  "Oh, my God,  are you all right?" Clark asked.

"I'm fine. I'm fine."

"What happened? You were gone for almost ten seconds."

"Ten seconds?"

"The weirdest ten seconds of my life. I didn't know where you  were, what to do and then..."

"What?"

"I just got this feeling of what my life would be like if I lost  you."

She smiled when she was suddenly lost in his embrace.

"Oh, wait," Clark said. "What about the curse?"

"Herb said it was already broken. And you know what that  means..." She wiggled her eyebrows at him.

"Already broken? When?"

"He... he didn't actually say. Why?"

"Because... Lois, don't you remember? This appearance by Wells happens when Wells is..."

"...older," Lois gasped when it sank in what Clark was telling  her. When Wells had come to Clark's apartment... or would come to  Clark's apartment... on their wedding night, he had been a  younger version of the Wells she'd met on this occasion. Which  meant... although to him, they had already gone back to break the  curse, to them, it was something that hadn't happened yet.

"Agggg!" Lois yelled. It wasn't fair! It just wasn't!

* * * * * * * * * Fade Out * * * * * * * * *

Deleted Scenes From Soulmates

Lois groaned as her husband's lips explored hers. She even felt  slightly lightheaded when he finally released her.

"To be continued... in Hawaii," he said, his voice holding all  sorts of underlying meaning. "Ready?"

"Ready..." Her eyes suddenly caught sight of their luggage.  "Wait. I'm missing a bag. I must have left it at home." She made  a flying motion with her hand. "Do you mind?"

"Something tells me we won't be needing a lot of clothes on our  honeymoon, Lois."

"Yeah. But it's got that little black teddy you bought me..."

She blinked when a sudden blur clouded her vision. Before she  could react, the blur was back, suddenly materializing into Superman holding a small suitcase.

"...in it," Lois completed unnecessarily.

"This the bag?"

"Hope you don't do everything that fast."

Clark grinned. "One way to find out." Sweeping her up in his  arms, he carried her to the bed.

"What about Hawaii?"

"Hawaii... can wait," he decided, echoing her feelings. "We've  been through so much to get to this point, this moment."

She couldn't agree more, meeting his kiss with her own. It didn't  take long for things to turn from gentle and sweet to hot and  heavy - as they'd been prone to do a lot in recent weeks. She  moaned when his lips moved to her neck and his hands began  running up her sides, brushing against some very sensitive places  during the course of their trip.

Even through the fog of passion which was quickly engulfing her,  her mind told her that something was missing - something was  wrong. But for the life of her, with his teeth nibbling at her  earlobe like that, she couldn't remember what it was.

But... Suddenly it hit her. She forcibly removed Clark from her  neck.

"No!" she said, struggling to catch her breath.

"No?" Clark asked.

The adorable confusion on his face was almost too much for her to  bear. Still... although her insides suddenly felt as if they were  filled with molten lava, she repeated her previous comment.  "No."

Clark pulled back, looking as if she'd just stolen his teddy  bear.

"No," she began. "...that's not... Clark, don't you remember?"

"What?"

"The curse! Come on, Clark. Before we can..." She made a sweeping  motion over the bed. "...we've still got to break the curse."

Clark closed his eyes, letting his face drop into the curve of  her throat. He'd obviously forgotten. She felt her heart go out  to him. She wasn't looking forward to taking time on their  honeymoon to deal with the curse, either. But it had to be done.

A sudden knock sounded. "Thank, God." Lois quickly slipped out  from under Clark. "Come on. We don't want him to think that we  aren't home and leave or something," Lois said, heading for the  door.

"Oh, hello," Wells said when Lois opened the door. "I hope I  wasn't..."

His voice trailed off when Lois grabbed him by his lapels,  pulling him into the room.

"Ms. Lane, Mr. Kent, I'm..."

"H.G. Wells. Yeah, we know," said Lois. "Okay, so let's just skip  all the niceties. You're here to help us reverse a terrible curse  that Tempus casts sometime during the middle ages. A curse that  causes me to die in some horrible way in every lifetime when we  consummate. Yadda. Yadda. Yadda. So... let's just get on with it.  Do you have any idea how long we've waited for you to show up?"

"I..."

"Look, Mr. Wells, what my wife is trying to say is..." Clark's  voice trailed off at a look from Lois. He was wasting valuable  time.

"Ahh... Okay, well then." Wells pulled out his soul tracker.  "Let's go."

* * * * * * * * *

As Lois lay in bed, watching her sleeping husband, a slow smile  spread across her face. That had been... amazing. It wasn't that Clark had been experienced, but... Actually, maybe that was the  difference between Clark and her previous sexual encounters.  Making love with Clark had been about so much more than  technique. It had been a complete experience - body, heart, soul.  The discovery of how to please each other. The desire to get so  close that they almost wanted to climb inside each other's skin.  Hearing the love when he'd whispered her name. Feeling the love  when she'd whispered his.

She ran her hand softly down his chest, marveling in every line  and curve of his oh so perfect body - a body she'd lusted after  since the first time she'd seen a droplet of water running down  his stomach to get lost in the towel wrapped around his waist.

In some ways, though, Tempus had done them a favor. God, she could hardly believe she was even thinking that. But the enforced wait had allowed her and Clark's feelings to develop, their  hearts to grow and their trust to mature. When they had finally  come together, it had been about so much more than just sex. It had been the fulfillment of a promise.

Of course... Her smile widened. ...she couldn't say she minded  the fact that, for the rest of her life, she was going to have  exclusive access to this incredible body.

"What are you thinking?"

Lois' eyes met Clark's. "You're awake."

Clark nodded. "So... what put such a thoughtful expression on  your face?"

Her eyes sparkled. "I was just thinking about a drop of water,"  she informed him cryptically, leaning in to kiss him so that his  mind was soon too distracted to follow up on that line of  inquiry.

And they lived happily ever after.

* * * * * * * * * The End * * * * * * * * *

Table of Contents

Galactically Stupid - The Whole Story

Deleted Scene From The Pilot

Deleted Scene From Honeymoon In Metropolis

Deleted Scene From Fly Hard

Deleted Scenes From Tempus Fugitive

Deleted Scene From And The Answer Is...

Deleted Scene From The End of Virtually Destroyed

Deleted Scenes From Tempus, Anyone?

Deleted Scenes From Soulmates